I just need them to be okay.

I just need them to be okay.

I don't know how many different ways parents have said that to me over the years.

Maybe your teenager comes home after a painful breakup.

Or doesn't make the team.

Or walks in the door, crushed because they were left out by their friends.

The situations are different.

The thought is almost always this.

I just need them to be okay.

A client put words to it in a way I haven't forgotten.

Her daughter leaves for boarding school in a few weeks.

She looked at me and said,

"What if she calls me crying and wants to come home?"

Then she got quiet.

"I don't know if I could handle her being so upset."

Neither of us said anything for a moment.

Then I thought about all the parents who've sat across from me over the years and how often I'd heard the same thoughts.

Maybe if I can just say the right thing.

Maybe I can help them feel a little better.

Maybe I can make this hurt a little less.

And then we say things like...

"You'll find your people."

"He doesn't deserve you anyway."

"You'll make the next team."

"This one test doesn't define you."

You wish you could take the hurt away.

You'd do almost anything if it meant they didn't have to feel this way.

And if you're really honest...

Sometimes you need them to be okay just as much as they do.

🧡 Jeanine

What happened recently that was especially hard for you to watch your child struggle with? Just comment below. I read every one.